I hate being in a good mood. The extreme highs of jubillation spell nothing but trouble to me. This comes from experience. The wisdom that comes from understanding that the universe has some inherent need for balance. A twisted way of leveling off the average, by use of polar opposites.
Last week was fantastic. This week has officially blown. It's had a few redeeming qualities, sure, but I just can't get over this feeling of having accomplished nothing.
Now, I hate complaining about things. Makes me feel like a self centered asshole, and I have tried to make a habit of supressing how irritated I am by most things. I can generaly keep calm, maintain composure, and ensure that my rage is contained to the confines of my own mind. But the quality and consistancy of pitfalls this week is just too much. I've had to deal with more stressful scenarios in the past without losing any sleep, but this time, I don't know. I just feel exhausted.
I hate feeling uninspired too. I usually have at least some idea running through my head at any given moment. A melody, or ideas for lyrics, or beats, or something. Right now, nothing. If I wasn't so lethargic at the moment, I'm sure it'd be driving me crazy.
I'm going to listen to L'Orchestre de la Suisse Romande and call it a day.
It's not even 1 pm and I'm already giving up on the day. SUPER! Stupid Tess being right. I should stop posting when I'm happy. Fucking karma.
I should probably stop feeling sorry for myself too. YAY!
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
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2 comments:
Be happy that you aren't like this all the time. I'm sure you'll come out of this slump. Don't worry about complaining it's the only way those demons will get released from your body. If you let that kind of annoyance build up you could find yourself standing over a burlap sack full of baby pugs with a fire poker held high above your head in some sort of twisted golf swing. I've been there and it's incredibly hard to put the brakes on if you get that far.
I'm not that far off...I have a hot poker and a burlap sack....
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